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Thinking Plague

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Thinking Plague

Possessed

In the dark
waiting with loathing
and dread
she is coming
alerted by my self-pity
she is a child
frozen in her pain
I can never be free of her
and never she of me
sometimes she comes
when I'm trying to know love
she torments me
and tells me
I am not worthy
she is almost here
I can't bear to be
used by her to take revenge
on all who come too near
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for fear that they might
make me whole
and her fade away

In my youth
she and I were one
through ridicule and hate
I was torn from myself

She is here

Childhood's wretched slave
can never be led to freedom

Is hatred's hungry child
asleep within all our reason?