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Constraints

Desperate Times

Days are long but I'm keeping strong.
Still struggling to make it through the day.
Not like I care anyways
My days seem bleak and nothing else matters at all.

I've tried to pick myself out of this train of thought.
With nothing left to keep me sane.
The hardships I've battled night after night,
Have left me feeling fucking worthless.

I can't fucking fight it.

Should I call it a day?
Make believe that I can still be ok?
Drowning myself in problems I wish I left at home.
I keep telling myself,
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'I'll be ok, well I'll be ok.'
But it's not convincing and I'm not convinced

'Above all else, guard your heart for it's the wellspring of life.'
The message that he told me,
Right before the rise.
'Just because you couldn't beat it,
Doesn't mean you should lose hope in yourself.'

I can't stand to look at this mirror, without seeing a change.

Will this ever end?
Will this year ever end, oh please let it end!